Ah, January! The month after the month when you were told to eat, drink and be merry.
Now we get to turn the tables on ourselves. Now is the time when everyone in the world gets to feel a bit Irish. Because now is the time you get to hate yourself.
No more are we encouraged to love one another and raise a glass to life, love and happiness. No, indeed. It’s time instead to put down that glass, become self-obsessed, and loathe ourselves with a passion unparalleled since that time you got laughed at for walking across a crowded room whilst wearing your skirt firmly tucked into your knickers.
Regrets, I’ve Had A Few
Every candle-lit memory, every glowing sense of sugary bonhomie which Christmas brought you: they’re all ruined now. At least until Lent, anyway.
That glass of champagne shared at midnight on New Year’s Eve with those you love best in…
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